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smootpepper
09-19-2005, 10:06 PM
In times like this a little humor helps ease the pain. So come up with a caption or headline for how the season has gone so far. You know, like...

Tice sick of late season slide, postpones winning till second half of season.

or

Culpepper sacrifices personal stats in order to help defense gel.


Come on, lets hear your headings. :grin:

vikesfan353
09-19-2005, 10:09 PM
Vikes give opponents false sense of security by "throwing" away first 2 games!

JDogg926
09-19-2005, 10:12 PM
After receiving a threatening phone call from the 72 Dolphins, the Vikings decide to just give away the first two games of the season to ensure that they won't go undefeated.

Del Rio
09-19-2005, 10:13 PM
Rabid Badger snatches coaching staffs balls, Minnesota residents searching woods in hopes of finding them before the Saints roll into town.

Prophet
09-19-2005, 10:14 PM
Tantalizing Tice.

MensaTice
09-19-2005, 10:17 PM
Minnesota's mentally retarded coaching staff experiment surprisingly fails!

MensaTice
09-19-2005, 10:19 PM
Headline: It could be worse in Minnesota...they could be Green Bay

Del Rio
09-19-2005, 10:22 PM
Culpepper Diagnosed with Ryan Leaf Disease, Treatment to Start Immediately.

smootpepper
09-19-2005, 10:22 PM
Vikings try to make it easy on randy by showing him things could be worse then being traded to Oakland.

pigskinronin
09-19-2005, 10:24 PM
After recently watching the movie 'Major League', owner Zygi Wilf is inspired to order the Vikings coaching staff to lose every game so he can move the team to Los Angeles.

smootpepper
09-19-2005, 10:27 PM
Culpepper upset over bennet stealing his play book in week 2. Bennet off to a good start in promise to be a star just like Daunte.

snowinapril
09-19-2005, 10:34 PM
Touble at the Airport:

Daunte had to file a report with NWA because some of the baggage was lost on the way home from Cincy. When the Airline employee pointed out that he left the contents and value of the baggage space empty, Daunte said, "value is $0, and the content is our coaching staff."

When asked if he wanted it Fed Ex'd to his home, he said no, could you please make sure it stays lost until after the Superbowl or send them to the New England.

vikings11_27
09-19-2005, 10:53 PM
Vikings blow

VKG4LFE
09-19-2005, 10:57 PM
At least we're not Detroit??

and_one_
09-19-2005, 11:51 PM
Vikings got rid of all the problem players on their team. Now the only problem is that the team is full of nice guys who don't want to be mean and beat the other team because it might hurt their feelings.

mnjamie
09-19-2005, 11:57 PM
"In an attempt to increase his distance throwing his challenge flag after all his practice last year, Tice consults with CPep. Little did he know the veteran Quarterback would begin to mimic his coaches throwing motion and lead to an 0-2 start. "

jellovike
09-20-2005, 12:17 AM
"Loney publishes his offensive playbook consisting soley of tic tac toe games and a picture of a football"

hic-agvike77
09-20-2005, 12:24 AM
With Moss gone, Culpepper's spreading the ball around..........to the wrong team.

SharperImage42
09-20-2005, 12:45 AM
Vikings lose on purpose to show that there too gangster for the NFL. =)

snowinapril
09-20-2005, 12:51 AM
For you Kinpin Fans



"Munson was Vikinged"

mnjamie
09-20-2005, 12:52 AM
Was just watching PTI on ESPN ... a show I enjoy. But man, Wilbon just said," HARRINGTON (detoilet) Pulled a CPep " as harrington threw an interception ... just to let everyone know, that hurt ...... deeply.

ThorSPL
09-20-2005, 01:00 AM
In a desperate attempt to hire The Simpsons writers as staff, Vikings have calculated an algorith of play calling and defensive schemes based on key words said every 15 seconds of last week's episode.

"Doh" = Run up middle
"Dude" = Cpep Int.

.... you get the point

As it turns out, this only was in place for game one, and the Homer system actually WAS calling the plays in week 2; Homer did better than Tice.

mnjamie
09-20-2005, 01:04 AM
"ThorSPL" wrote:

In a desperate attempt to hire The Simpsons writers as staff, Vikings have calculated an algorith of play calling and defensive schemes based on key words said every 15 seconds of last week's episode.

"Doh" = Run up middle
"Dude" = Cpep Int.

.... you get the point

As it turns out, this only was in place for game one, and the Homer system actually WAS calling the plays in week 2; Homer did better than Tice.



I knew Tice and/or Loooooooooooney couldn't have engineered that final drive .... Good Job Homer, Good JOB !!!!!!!! :evil4:

Ltrey33
09-20-2005, 01:51 AM
Today in fashion: Is orange really the new pink? And is losing really the new winning? The Vikings' Mike Tice says "Yes."

Paulbedy59
09-20-2005, 02:22 AM
Vikings help fans down in New Orleans realise that well,it could be worse..

smootpepper
09-20-2005, 02:35 AM
Culpepper found with "hooked on Phonics" book, says he is hopeful that he will learn how to read defenses and the Playbook at the same time.


or


Tice trades in pencil for glasses. Say its to help see what he has been smelling for the last week.

Paulbedy59
09-20-2005, 02:41 AM
Bennet stuck at stadium after dropping keys down sewer.

shockzilla
09-20-2005, 02:49 AM
"Having traded in his vacation time for timeouts, and in the mistaken belief that he won't get any for the next game if he doesn't use them all up before the end of the current game, Tice calls two time-outs with 2:00+ left in the game against the Bengals."

Paulbedy59
09-20-2005, 02:51 AM
LOL good shock. Moss seen watching Vikings Bengals game heard to mutter WTF!!

singersp
09-20-2005, 02:51 AM
Possible 10/24 future headline:

H.H.H. DOME COLLAPSES: Experts say Vikings & Packers sucked so bad a huge vaccuum was created causing the dome to be sucked in.

eelpout72
09-20-2005, 04:30 AM
"Vikings trade entire coaching staff for ball of lint"

SharperImage42
09-20-2005, 04:37 AM
Cincinnati Bengals WR Chad Johnson and QB Carson Palmer under trial most likely to have a 5-6 year sentencing for raping CB Antoine Winfield, CB Fred Smoot, and FS Darren Sharper, it is said that Sharper has suffered injury because of Chad.

singersp
09-20-2005, 04:38 AM
Wilf calls for firing of Tice. Tices tosses in red flag to challenge the call.

smootpepper
09-20-2005, 04:39 AM
Wilf enacts lemon law, calls red for money back.

singersp
09-20-2005, 04:42 AM
If Vikes don't win by week 4, Wilf promises to give new meaning to "BYE" week.

singersp
09-20-2005, 04:44 AM
"smootpepper" wrote:

Wilf enacts lemon law, calls red for money back.

Red offers to buy back Vikings for $200 million

DoraTheExplorer
09-20-2005, 04:45 AM
"singersp" wrote:

"smootpepper" wrote:

Wilf enacts lemon law, calls red for money back.

Red offers to buy back Vikings for $200 million

Wilf Counters Offer: 200 million and Bag of Cheetos.

waynesworld
09-20-2005, 04:51 AM
pepp named team MVP.....for cinci and TB

PurplePeopleEaters
09-20-2005, 04:53 AM
"eelpout72" wrote:

"Vikings trade entire coaching staff for ball of lint"

Really? Sweet! :grin:

smootpepper
09-20-2005, 04:55 AM
Mike Tice doesnt just ride the short bus, he owns it.

guzziVike
09-20-2005, 04:58 AM
"Cincinnati Stadium Officials file charges against Vikings for acts of public defication. On-field Staff go on strike; heard claiming "I'm not picking this sh*t up!"

SharperImage42
09-20-2005, 05:35 AM
LOL u no y were losing.. moss mitve left that green behing him and daunte "stumled over it"

vikinggreg
09-20-2005, 05:44 AM
Tice suffers first degree concussion after being struck with an idea for a game plan. Coaching staff remark "we never saw that coming" :shock:

ultravikingfan
09-20-2005, 05:44 AM
"guzziVike" wrote:

"Cincinnati Stadium Officials file charges against Vikings for acts of public defication. On-field Staff go on strike; heard claiming "I'm not picking this sh*t up!"

Lucky Najeh "Poo-poo" Davenport did not play there! :lol:

PurplePackerEater
09-20-2005, 05:50 AM
You guys are GOOD.

Do you guys lay awake at night coming up with this stuff??

cajunvike
09-20-2005, 05:53 AM
Simplistic Vikings offensive scheme shows why Head Coach's nickname is Vanilla Tice!

Tice, Tice Baby (doom doom doom dida doom doom)
Tice, Tice Baby (doom doom doom dida doom doom)

ultravikingfan
09-20-2005, 05:57 AM
"Mike, was Randy the key to the Offense the past few years?" http://www.startribune.com/stonline/images/news41/1tice0730.e.jpg

Ltrey33
09-20-2005, 06:00 AM
Tice Fails IQ Test, Demoted to Equipment Manager.

vikinggreg
09-20-2005, 06:03 AM
http://www.startribune.com/stonline/images/news41/1tice0730.e.jpg

Coach homer loses eye reaching for pencil

singersp
09-20-2005, 06:11 AM
http://www.startribune.com/stonline/images/news41/1tice0730.e.jpg

Coach says not to worry. I have all the offensive plays written down right here

ultravikingfan
09-20-2005, 06:21 AM
http://www.stthomas.edu/facilities/images/ticepics/Mike1.jpg
"Tice demoted!!! His High School team already 0-2!!!"

WBLVikeBabe
09-20-2005, 06:23 AM
"Viking fan commits suicide due to depression over two losses in a row"

ultravikingfan
09-20-2005, 06:23 AM
http://images.nfl.com/photos/img8089693.jpg

Tempers flare...Tice assaulted after loss!

ultravikingfan
09-20-2005, 06:27 AM
Tice Fired!!! Opens New Business!!!

http://meatheadmovers.org/images/MeatheadMoversBillboard.jpg

MensaTice
09-20-2005, 06:32 AM
"Trading Moss was the right thing to do"- Steve Mariucci


postseason headline:
Onterrio Smith brought back to share his "secrets" to struggling Vikings RBs. Michael Bennett leads NFC in rushing, later admitting that he was too paranoid to get tackled or fumble the ball.

SharperImage42
09-20-2005, 06:37 AM
Nfl Comissioner Paul Tagliabue finds reciept with name Mike Tice on it, than quickly decided if he should suspend the vikings team as a whole for returning steriods becuase there obvioulsy not working.

Ltrey33
09-20-2005, 04:29 PM
Tice Scalps Tickets, Fans Scalp Tice.

vikesfan353
09-20-2005, 05:17 PM
"Three blind Tice, Three blind Tice" Take a look at what he can't see, and everybody else can!

JDogg926
09-20-2005, 05:29 PM
Vikings punter Kluwe, early candidate for Rookie of the Year, MVP.

cajunvike
09-20-2005, 05:39 PM
Tice suits up at QB for next game...figures that he can't do any worse than Culpepper...plus he gets to live out his dream of being an NFL QB leftover from his college days of QBing the Maryland Terps!

From his bio:

As a 2-year starter at QB at Maryland, Tice completed 71-of-140 passes for 928 yards with five touchdowns as a senior in ‘80. He threw for 896 yards and 5 touchdowns as a junior. When Tice was a senior his backup was future NFL All-Pro Boomer Esiason.

Of course, George O'Leary was his high school coach, so we might want to double check to see if Tice's stats are actually true. :lol:

josdin00
09-20-2005, 06:16 PM
2006 Preseason: Tice looking to get back in with Vikes
In a move to get re-employed with the Vikings, Tice steals idea from Packers; offers players rides to practice field on his bike

Jviking
09-20-2005, 06:20 PM
Tice found in bathroom with explicit pictures of bennett, Culpepper enraged-

VKG4LFE
09-20-2005, 06:21 PM
"Deja Vu, Daunte throws for 5 TDs in Vikings romp over the Saints for First win of the season"

smootpepper
09-20-2005, 06:23 PM
Culpepper finally has a dry chin after having to please moss for all those years. Now has a sore butt from everyone riding him.

KennyJman
09-20-2005, 06:33 PM
Minnesota Vikings strike deal with major network! They will do several commercials to promote ABC's LOST...

VKG4LFE
09-20-2005, 06:34 PM
lol kennyjman, that was really good!

Ltrey33
09-20-2005, 06:34 PM
September 1, 2007
Vikings To Open New Stadium in Anoka:

The Vikings will be holding a ceremony to open their new stadium at the start of the 2007 season. On Sunday, the Vikings will hang former coach Mike Tice from the specially designed gallows built into the new Viking ship in the North endzone at Bud Grant field. His body will remain there for the remainder of the season as a reminder to the coaching staff that in the words of Zygi Wilf "Failure will no longer be tolerated."

southern_yankee
09-20-2005, 06:36 PM
"ltrey33" wrote:

September 1, 2007
Vikings To Open New Stadium in Anoka:

The Vikings will be holding a ceremony to open their new stadium at the start of the 2007 season. On Sunday, the Vikings will hang former coach Mike Tice from the specially designed gallows built into the new Viking ship in the North endzone at Bud Grant field. His body will remain there for the remainder of the season as a reminder to the coaching staff that in the words of Zygi Wilf "Failure will no longer be tolerated."

funny...morbid, but definitely funny...

TheViking
09-20-2005, 07:10 PM
In a last ditch effort to save his job Tice placed a call with the Raiders begging for Moss back. He reportedly offered them a middle linebacker and a first round pick. The Raiders responded with HAAAAA HAAAAAA HAAAAA HAAAAA!

Ltrey33
09-20-2005, 10:42 PM
"TheViking" wrote:

In a last ditch effort to save his job Tice placed a call with the Raiders begging for Moss back. He reportedly offered them a middle linebacker and a first round pick. The Raiders responded with HAAAAA HAAAAAA HAAAAA HAAAAA!

:lol:

JDogg926
09-20-2005, 10:43 PM
"Oh crap, are you serious? The season started already." - Mike Tice

VKG4LFE
09-20-2005, 10:52 PM
"TheViking" wrote:

In a last ditch effort to save his job Tice placed a call with the Raiders begging for Moss back. He reportedly offered them a middle linebacker and a first round pick. The Raiders responded with HAAAAA HAAAAAA HAAAAA HAAAAA!


We have a winner folks! Good work theviking.

ultravikingfan
09-20-2005, 11:17 PM
"Tice's Career Mirrors Unfortunate Motorist"

http://www.ilovebacon.com/072303/planecar.jpg